Never in doubt
I’m not going to claim to be a literary and comedy genius, such as whoever had the time to write the WotsHeDunThatFor match reports, but in honour of our fallen comrades I will be stepping up to the plate and delivering the news on Southamptons finest fourth team. Here we go.

NSE

In the weeks leading up to the season opener, there were undoubtedly rumours in the Team 4 camp of transfers in the off season. Thanks to inside knowledge from the SVGE hierarchy, a number of potential fraggers were spotted in the development squads and discussions were had of potential dips into the transfer market. Indeed, the chances of another 3k Faceit elo joining Southampton were low and to have one available for signing? This could be the change the squad needed to push for NUEL glory; to push for national acclaim and for skep to finally be allowed to play squash. Alas, much like a Disney movie, the power of friendship prevailed and the team stuck together.

Sunday. The big day. The boys knew that a solid 2-0 would be expected from the fans at home and that nothing less would mean an uphill battle for the Highfield fellas. After a close heart to heart at 6am outside a tesco, Jshaffinator promised Mr “erm” President a solid DM session before the game.

Did his hours go up?
Did he launch CS:GO before 7pm?
Hotel?
trivago

We never will know, as the first game went without a hitch. A pitiful display from the University of Gloucestershire boys allowed a swift 16-0 victory. J-dog was right, deathmatch is wasted when you have the raw ability of “TAGALOGPEEK Ting “dropping a casual 21-3. Lovely stuff. We couldn’t even hear their cries of unfair seeding as we sat upon our thrones of inflated egos.

A well-deserved break followed the dismantling, and the aero nerds could discuss some sort of race car placement thing and the desire to submit a form before midnight. Clearly, csgo was not the priority tonight and this would be the explanation for what was to occur. No other reason. Surely the fact that we hadn’t played together since the summer season (post jesters faceit doesn’t count) could not have a bearing on our performance?

We were up against G12, who we knew well having lost no less than 4 maps to the Scottish academics. We probably should have been more cautious going into it but misplaced bravado prevailed. A choice between Nuke and Overpass was offered by H-bomb. Wessex Warrior Wndy proudly stated his confidence, “we need to stop being scared and picking maps we think teams wont be good at, since we are better than them.” Wise words from the btec medicine student and we skipped gleefully into overpass.

From the knife round, it was all looking T4; a knife clutch from young skeppers sent us to CT side where a new pistol strategy gave the footing for a 3-0 lead. A couple lost rounds from sketchy at best b holds put t4 into ecos and the game was close. A pivotal moment came as the boys trailed 6-7: skep fell early to a aggression but eddie was ready to reply with a smooth 3k with the scoping stick. 1v3 and the bomb was planted on B. The odds were in our favour. And then the unthinkable happened. We lost. A miscommunication of what we were doing gave the Glasgow man 2 clean 1v1s and HannoverPEEK whiffed his USP shots to give the round over. The man had won a 1v3 in water against cts coming from heaven and graffiti. Shambles.

*DEAD* rico: LOL

It stung. Bookings were made in the hotel de la tilt. The rest was history. The boys could amount some rounds on the terrorist side, but a lack of cohesion meant any coordinated offensives were messy at best. A 1v3 from skep raised morale, but the lads fell to defeat. 16-9. Not our best.

NUEL

With dreams as big as the pret queue after lectures, the boys filtered into the team 4 discord, with one question on their mind “Would things get better?”. The answer? Ehhhhh.

First up, a little showdown versus a new fresh squad of SVGE talent (+Gary). Excitement built in the team 4 voice channel and, dare I say it, nerves crept in as the Twitch Superstars Andy and Hanno loaded their streams to show the world the spectacle. Mirage was the arena and Team4 inc. began on the ct side.
Pistol round was a mess of whiffs. Team 4 had correctly called the a site stack but missed shots from Father Joe and President Andy meant a site had fallen to the fresh blood. Firing back into the rifle rounds; team4 gathered some momentum with a clean retake on a and wndy cleaning up on short with the TAGALOGPEEK ambassadors holding on tightly to B. However, we forgot to calculate for the self-proclaimed 2.2K elo, ESEA open veteran masterminding the t side and facing round and after round of structured Counterstrike proved too much for the hardened uk uni cs team. 8-7 against T4 at the half.

A pistol B rush equalled the score and a well converted anti-eco was executed to push us back into the lead with further rifle rounds extending the lead to 11-9. However, the rustiness of a new semester took its toll. Poor mid round decisions after taking mid control and an inability to deal with cheeky A pushes from the young‘uns put Team4 in a precarious position. A half-hearted A execute typified the performance and Joe Chef dying to a Molotov whilst holding a smoke on his back – don’t lie to me https://imgur.com/a/NnAiUW5 – was perhaps a sign all was not well. Round after round, the freshers (+kwackle) mounted a ct sided showstopper and took themselves to 14-11.

Then some magic.

Skep had found his 3000 elo underneath his mousepad and unleashed his deagle onto the b site, picking up an AK and a subsequent double spray down in market to bring T4 back into the game. This newfound energy raised the boys and the comeback was on. A 3v4 in the next, forced a save from the new kids, desperate to preserve their weakening economy. Another save brought the game equal to 14-14 and with this confidence, the A site was cracked like a walnut. 16-14 with Ting and honorary TAGOLOGPEEK member Hanno winning a 2v3 postplant confirming the win meant huge sighs of relief across the discord and the prestigious top spot of Southampton was still in team4s shaky hands.

As a moment to keep things real, it was a really good match and it’s a great feeling to see that SVGE has so many exciting new players, bringing an energy and element of teamplay that wasn’t there when I was a fresher. So we can meme and joke about people, but we are glad to see that CS:GO at svge will remain to be a top branch of our society with really good people :)

After that soppy mess, Team4 turned their attention to the next game: Warwick, no doubt fresh from a sweaty session in their gaming room. Don’t care. We can still frag. Who needs university backing anyway? Not us, as we took the T side pistol and skep carefully performing a 1v3 in the second round. A 3-0 lead was returned by a 5 round twattering as Southamptons greatest forgot how to take the b site. Legend has it, there is still one barrels sweeping up oblivious terrorists. Rounds were traded back and forth and Warwick lead 7-5. After reading Rudras strat book for taking B site, it was open for business and the bomb was planted in a 1v4.

To understand what happened next, it is crucial to understand what each T4 member was doing.
Wndy and ting: Hunting the last kill
Hanno: Tabbed out fixing his lag
Jshaf: Well, being Jshaf

So, it is not hard to see how a sneaky warwick snake had penetrated our defences and defused the bomb.

Tables were banged. Curses were yelled. Deposits were lost.

The half sank into a miserable 10-5 defeat.

A weak ct pistol took things from bad to worst and the eco round had the thoughts of gg above our heads. 12-5 down. Could things be even worse for the boys?

The first rifle round, was quiet but clean with 4 T4 men surviving. The next round was a masterclass of a retake from JShelf and Tingjamy as they won a 2v4 post plant to extend the game further. 12-7 down and brick-by-brick, Team4 found their way back. Skep became a fiend in the toilets and hanno became the overwatching sniper he had always held inside. B site had become a rock too, with Ting, Joe and Wndy holding firm against questionable executes. This was the theme for the rest of the half as the comeback became a reality, propelling the boys into a 14-12 lead. The 9 round streak was broken by a rare misplay on the b site, but no worries as the team took the next.

15-13

Two match points. A 5v4 favouring the South coast uni and warwick had their last roll of the dice, a coordinated push onto the a site. A flashbang from skep in defense, gave Andy the gift of 2 frags before going down. Skep managed to grab one more leaving the last player as the Warwick awper in a 1v4 with 20 seconds left. The cry of “Lets go boys!” was screamed by our awper as he fell as nobody could have expected the worst.
“He physically cannot win” – an anonymous team4 member
How wrong you were.
A rare blunder from Joe gave his life away and with 4 seconds left, Ting fell to the deagle spam.
As you can imagine, the mood was not great and the swarm of adoring fans had witnessed the blunder. It was dismal.
Warwick took a pause to let us seethe. We still had one match point left and if this was not taken, a depressing thought of overtime loomed.
The round began.
Jshaf dies to a wallbang but ting is quick to trade back. Intel was gathered of an imepeding b hit and the cavalry moved in. It paid off. Skep picked up 3 kills. We win the round. It was never in doubt.

The boys will be back on Sunday and hopefully it will be less stressful.